We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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