I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Randomize
