Those balls look pretty dangerous.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
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