oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
There's a naked man in my car right now.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
