His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Randomize