I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
Randomize
