Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
Randomize
