Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
Less talking, more tequila
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Randomize
