Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
I had to cum in my sink.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
