I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
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