And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Randomize
