I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
she looked like the before picture.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Randomize
