# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Randomize
