don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Randomize