Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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