I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
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