Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize