need another drink. this is the easiest way
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
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