More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
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