turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize
