my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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