I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Randomize
