You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
