He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
there's paper in my vomit.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
