it was like eating out sand paper
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize
