i'm signing you up for texting rehab
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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