I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
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