If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Randomize
