Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Randomize