Who did Billy Mays play for?
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize