Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Randomize
