i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Randomize
