After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
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