you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
