i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
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