Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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