Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
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