bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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