i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
where does the pee come out of this thing
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
