I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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