Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Randomize
