i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
