I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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