she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Randomize
