You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Randomize