The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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