wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
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