garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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