Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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