when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
Randomize
